Tonya Reiman

Are you confused? Great! Me too! But let's get past the confusion and I will clarify. NLP stands for Neuro-Linguistic Programming. This is a technique developed by psychologists Grinder & Bandler. Using their techniques can help you read a person better. For example, a person's eye movements can tell you what's going on in their mind.

What eye movement means what

Their studies show that a person's eyes will move in different directions depending on whether they are remembering something that they have smelled, seen, touched, tasted or heard. Let me explain. When someone is recalling a feeling they had, they will look down and to the right. If they are trying to recall something they had heard, they will look to the side and possibly even tilt their head just as if they were listening to try and hear it again. When they are trying to remember something they had seen, they will look up.

So what does this mean to the Master Communicator?

What does this mean to the Master Communicator? Well, using this technique and looking for these clues will help you understand where a person's head is at. It is important to look for these signs in clusters. Remember, clusters are groups of body language behavior that all point to a common conclusion. This can help you in many ways, one of which is figuring out if a person is a more visual person, auditory person or kinesthetic (touch/feeling). It has been proven that every person falls more into one of these 3 more so than any of the others.

Look & Listen

Look and listen for clues. Someone who is more visual will say things like:

"That looks good to me" "I see your point" "Show me that again"

Someone that is more auditory will say things like:

"Sounds good" "I hear you" "That doesn't sound like it will work"

Someone that is more kinesthetic might say things like:

"I can't wrap my mind around it" "I don't feel it" "Let me kick that idea around"

Talk in their terms

Once you figure out what category the other person falls into and how they communicate you will be able to talk in their "terms". This will make them FEEL more accepting of what you say, HEAR more of what you are trying to convey and even help the SEE the big picture! :)

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